Okay, listen up.

Fall is basically Mother Nature saying: "Surprise! It's cold now. Good luck, buddy." So here's what you need in your closet if you want to survive AND look like you didn't just crawl out of bed.

1. The Big Boy Jacket

This green jacket makes you look like you go camping. Spoiler: you won't. But you could. And that's what matters.

2. The Beige Sweater of Doom

It's like wearing mashed potatoes. Warm, squishy, and makes adults nod at you like, "Nice sweater, champ."

3. The Plaid Shirt a.k.a. Lumberjack Starter Pack

Wanna look like you chop wood? Just wear this. Bonus: you don't need an axe. Or muscles. Or a cabin.

4. Jeans That Go With Literally Everything

Seriously. Jeans + anything = outfit. Jeans + shirt? Outfit. Jeans + socks? Still counts.

5. The Fancy Boots

These are for stomping in crunchy leaves and pretending you're in a music video where it's always raining (but not really, because rain ruins suede).

6. Sunglasses of Maximum Coolness 😎

They block the sun, yes. But more importantly, they make you look like you're hiding a dark secret (like eating 4 Pop-Tarts before dinner).

7. The Dad Bag

This bag is for "important man stuff." Translation: snacks, Pokémon cards, and maybe a charger you stole from your sibling.

Important conclusion:

If you wear all this stuff, you basically transform into Fall Guy™. Not the video game bean dude — the fashion bean dude. You'll walk into school and people will whisper, "Wow… he owns a jacket."